January 28th, 2009

1930 - A giant ice storm has hit the area. I don't know anything about what is going but all the power is out. We ate a shit dinner, an MRE might have been better.

This place is so exhausting. Everything is so regimented. I don't get yelled really at all. I keep my head down and do what I'm asked, stay quiet and put forth the best effort I can when at PT*. Everyone else just seems to be on different pages. And just listening to the DS's** is annoying beyond belief. Some, you can tell, are good people ,but it's just retarded how everything is done. So far we're geared up but haven't really done much. The ice storm shut down our first obstacle course today.

We'll get there. Listening to everyone, most want to be snipers, airborne, air assault, ranger, ect. Some will. Some won't. We'll see. I hope I do good. We've lost one person with a blown knee. I see several others limping. I know a few who are having trouble with their back and shoulders. Lots are sick; coughing all the time. Some just can't get with the program, and it's only been 7 days. I think a lot will get cut.

My back is really gone, my left shoulder is too, and so is my left knee. The other night 35 people ran up and down three flights of stairs for about 1.5 hours. That's what got my knee. The ice is scary. I've seen probably 20-30 people eat shit running or walking. My neck is starting to hurt also. I really can't fail. That would be terrible. I hope I start to feel better.

Hopefully we'll start getting to do some stuff soon.

You are never alone here, and there is noise. Yelling, screaming, banging, etc. 24 hours a day.

It's amazing. I am not sad about this decision, but I really miss home. What I wouldn't give for a night back home with the dogs and a little peace and quiet and a good night's sleep. I literally could fall asleep on my feet if I was allowed to.
I think one thing that sucks about this is that I don't need motivation to succeed, which is what I think a lot of the people here need. Hence the regimented yelling and shit.

I think I would be be more focused and relaxed if I knew everything was good at home and with the dogs. I can't stand how we can't use the phone. A single call would be great right now, or a letter. I suppose it seems like all I write is negative. I think that will change soon though. Well we will see what happens. I want to do this, but I feel so out of touch with reality sometimes.




*PT - Physical Training
**DS - Drill Sergeant